HE ATE MY COOKIES

http://peggysnoise.webs.com/apps/blog/

Assumptions...like first impressions can often be wrong. Sometimes they can be so wrong, you can be at the point of great embarrassment.
I was at the airport. I had an hour wait for my departure time. I decided to buy a newspaper to read, and a little snack. I sat down at a table where there was a well-dressed, nice looking gentleman across the table. As I was reading my paper, I heard the sound of crinkling of a cellophane wrapper. I looked up at the man. I saw him eating one of my cookies. I tried to ignore it, but then I heard him grabbing for another one! I reached around my paper, and slowly moved the cookies over closer to me. I ate one. I heard the cellophane again! I was fuming mad! This time, the man had a frown on his face, as he broke the last cookie in half and slid the other half towards me. He got up and left. I heard over the loud speaker that my flight was boarding. When I got to the ticket gate, I opened my purse to get my ticket. I found my package of cookies was still in my purse!!!

REPENT or REPAINT?

I was helping a friend of mine, repaint the exterior of our church. We were running low on paint, so my friend went to the store to get more. He was sure taking a long time, and it looked like it was going to rain. I wanted to get finished faster, so I added water to the paint and stirred it REAL GOOD. I only had a half of a side to do, but I was at the bottom of the can. I added more water, then stirred REAL GOOD. Just As I finished, It started to rain and then it thundered. I quickly looked at the paint job I had done. The rain was causing the thinned out paint to come off the siding, and onto the ground. ALL OF A SUDDEN, a big thunder came from the sky. I heard a voice say to me, "REPAINT YOU THINNER." ( a joke )

TO TELL THE TRUTH

Kids are so doggone honest. Sometimes you will find yourself in a moment of embarrassment when your child tells something to someone that you would prefer them not to know.

I took my son to the hospital a few days ago to get something checked out. While we were registering, the receptionist asked, "Who is his regular Doctor? " When I told her the Doctors' name, my Son said, "Mom, I thought you don't like him." My face went flush and I tried to laugh it off, so DID the receptionist.

BACKSEAT BIRD POOP

Sitting in the backseat of my Daughters car eight months pregnant. I couldn't fit behind the steering wheel, so I asked My Daughter to take me to my Dr. appointment. The air was fresh. It had rained just a few hours ago. The front car windows were open, but only halfway, so my hair would not get messy. All of a sudden I felt a plop on my shoulder!!! I put my hand there. Startled as I felt a gooey wetness. I screamed! It scared my Daughter, because she did not know what was going on back there! She pulled over. We all got out of the car . To our amazement... somehow... Bird poop had entered through the half opened window and landed on me. Everyone laughed at me when they watched me clean it off, using a puddle on the side of the street. I was told, "Mom, That is WHAT YOU CALL "BIRDBATH"

THE RACE IS ON

I had to take a test so I went to Walmart to buy a 3-Pack of #2 PENCILS. As I headed to the checkout lane, I noticed a woman with a full cart of items, rushing to get in the lane before I did... I was amazed at that., I had to laugh. Have you ever been in a store or gas station, picking up items and your arms are full. You're in line and you see the guy behind you just needs to pay for gasoline? Do you let him go in front of you? Of course you would! I HOPE.

TALENT WITH 50 NIFTY UNITED STATES

My Son is a memory whiz. He was 5 years old, in kindergarten when he entered the talent show, at school. I remember that night so clearly. It was getting late and it was almost over. People were starting to leave, and some parents around me were slumped in their chairs, waiting for this show to end. The announcer called my Sons' name and he went up to the microphone. As he started naming the US states in alphabetical order, people stopped in their tracks , those slumping parents , sat up straight in their chairs and listened intently. Oh how so very proud I was. In the fall, when school started again, my Sons' first grade teacher REMEMBERED HIM IN THAT TALENT SHOW!!! I suppose I should tell you how he learned it all. My Daughter would always sing the states song with him.

HAPPENING IN THE HOSPITAL ELEVATOR

I went to the hospital today to see a specialist. A friend went with me, as he understands doctor lingual better than I. In the elevator were my friend and I and another young women who stood in the back. We were headed to the 4th floor, but the door opened and a man came in and pressed the basement button. Under his right arm he was carrying some books. He had a DVD on his pointer finger through the hole, carrying it upright, partially in the air. My friend looked at him and said, " Wow, I sure hope your going to be able to get that taken off." {in a hospital setting, that was funny}. That man got out, the door closed.
My friend was then looking at the sign that said 4000 pounds max. He then commented, saying, "This elevator will hold 10 people weighing 400 pounds each." The woman that was in the back got off on the 3rd floor, and as she walked out , it was apparent that she could no longer hold in her burst of laughter. Oddly enough, when we got back in the elevator to leave the hospital, there were 10 people in that elevator.